Putting my fertility on ice allowed me to become a Mom

This week, we have a guest post from an Ovally contributor about her very personal journey from freezing her eggs to becoming a Mom of twins. We’re really grateful for her story and thankful to her for sharing it:

“I am 40 years old, happily married and am now expecting twins in a few weeks. There’s nothing special about that, you might think. But none of this came easily to me, and I am here to share my journey: My decision to freeze my eggs as a single woman in my early 30s with no sign of finding a life partner, my struggle to conceive after getting married at 37, and finally my joy when the positive line appeared on the pregnancy test. Writing a private story like this feels like showing the world my underwear drawer, but I hope that it can inspire some women to make timely fertility decisions and not be desperate for love or settle just because of an annoying biological clock. Here is my story for you:

In my early 30s, just graduated from business school, I was on top of my game at work, enjoying my life, traveling, partying, and living in different big and exciting cities. With a lifestyle focused on entrepreneurship and moving around the world, dating seemed like a fruitless endeavor. I decided that the best way to move forward without constantly hearing the damn biological clock ticking would be to freeze my eggs.

Living in China at the time, I had to find a country and a reputable clinic that allowed unmarried women to freeze their eggs. Egg freezing was not a very popular, socially accepted, or even legal procedure in many countries back in 2012. Freezing my eggs in Taiwan was like buying an insurance policy for the future to me, even if it wasn’t a perfect guarantee. It was really liberating and took pressure off of quickly finding Mr. Right. Instead of needing to start a family as soon as possible, it allowed me to pursue my career goals first.

A few years later, I moved from Shanghai to San Francisco. I shifted some of my priorities in life, gained confidence, and became more open to dating. I met an amazing guy who later on became my husband, and I honestly believe that if we had met each other when we were younger, we wouldn’t have fallen in love. We had a very romantic wedding in the castle of Portovenere, Italy, and our relationship has been so sweet and rewarding that I feel our love growing stronger every day.

But – we just couldn’t conceive. We were sad and frustrated but not hopeless: With 20 young frozen eggs, I figured it was time to cash in my insurance policy! Once my eggs had been thawed, fertilized, and screened for chromosomal abnormalities, we ended up with 9 healthy embryos. This seemed to give us plenty of chances to conceive, but it wasn’t that easy. The emotional rollercoaster of several failed pregnancy attempts was like a stab in the heart. I was deeply disappointed, but at the same time felt extremely fortunate: Quite a few of my girlfriends were also going through IVF and weren’t so lucky. Since they hadn’t frozen their eggs when they were younger, they could retrieve only a very small number of eggs, or in some cases none at all.

When I turned 40, I decided to pick myself up and focus on my mental and physical wellbeing, and gave it another try. And we got lucky: This time with lower expectation and much less anxiety, I got pregnant—with twins!! My doctor told us that using my young eggs had lowered my risk of complications for pregnancy and birth significantly, and it has been a good pregnancy. I am just super grateful that I made the decision to freeze my eggs at a younger age, which gave me a chance of motherhood. I can’t wait to become a Mom soon and hope it’ll be just brilliant.”

Update: The twin boys were born just recently, and everyone’s healthy and doing well!!

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